GladChild: Children and adolescents are more controlled by their emotions rather than rational and logical thinking. Emotions may explain why children and adolescents behave that way, including self destructive behavior. So if we want to motivate them we should understand the emotions that control them, and use it to guide behavior and thoughts are more deceptive.
Here is the 3 child emotional needs:
1. Need to feel safe
One of the strongest needs required a child is feeling safe. Secure in themselves and Their environment. Teens looking for a sense of security with a set of Their peers, Engaging Them Among the social rules, and imitate his behavior. You need to remember that love is not the same child with the child feel loved.
What causes the need for security is not met?
- Comparing the child with relatives or other persons
- criticize and find fault child
- Physical and verbal violence in children
2. The need for recognition, accepted and loved.
Rarely do parents make their children feel important and recognized at home. Conversely, many parents are making their children feel small and insignificant with the threats and commands.
What is in the minds of children if treated like that? Parents We are just happy if the kids do the Things We command, but there That Their children were the resource persons at the mind Feel Defeated by doing what the Parents in that way. So many children who delayed or did not do what is assigned Parents (even with the threat though) to meet the emotional needs for recognition.
If children do not feel loved and accepted by parents, they will be encouraged to look at all the wrong places.
The desire of a child to be recognized and want to be loved is so strong, so they will do anything to get it. If they do not get recognition in the right way it will be found in the wrong way and the wrong place. This requirement encourages some children and teenagers to use a tattoo, disturbing other children, painting the hair with striking color, behaving like a clown and comedian. It is generally trouble themselves, but for the sake of getting recognition and accepted (attention).
3. Need for control (feeling self / desire to control)
As the child's growth, while search for identity and independence while learning to build from the parent. This process creates an emotional needs to be free and independent.
So that's why kids do not want to be governed to what to do. By listening to the advice of their parents seemed to be treated like a child.
Parents who are smart, will not surrender to face this. How do I provide direction, and for the child's parents want to hear? Use communication that does not mean forcing a child with our advice. make as if they learn and work hard for themselves not for us. they will be more excited and keeping motivated that way. And most importantly meet our child's love tank every day and make sure children are always full when you wake up wake up and before bed. That way the child knows who is most understanding and affection, and to whom he will come in time of need someone to hear.
